Artie, John the Stutterer and J.D. took on casinos, blackmail and hookers!

Surprisingly Artie didn’t do any gambling even with the casino giving him 5K in chips. He gave out 500 each to J.D. and John.

Who got laid?
Artie got laid once.
J.D. got laid twice.
John got a regular coke.

I heard something earlier (half awake) about some chick telling Artie that she will go to the Papers unless Artie did something… i missed that whole segment. Did anyone get it?

thanks for the picture Steve!

I don’t know if anyone else noticed this but I think John the Stutterer and Lisa G. are brother and sister. This picture from HowardStern.com is disturbing:

Artie gave out his phone number to see if he would get any strange calls. We called but only got a full voice mail message, but did hear his greeting. “Hey its Artie, please leave a message after the beep”

According to Howard this morning, Artie weighs 300 pounds and thats after losing 3 pounds.

When asked if Lisa G would give Artie a BJ to save his life, not surprising, Lisa said she would let Artie die.

They are running a contest over at HowardStern.com to either find Artie’s mugshot or create one of your own.

Fully story here

High Pitch Mike came in the studio today with a “Deal or no Deal” to Artie and the show. Mike had gotten pictures of himself from his solo trip to Disney world. He said that he would allow the show to see them and post them on Howard TV and the website IF Artie gets on the scale.

Artie said it would be too depressing to get on the scale. Mike said that Artie promised the fans over a month ago that he would return to the scale but Artie said he didn’t care. Mike then showed the pictures to Howard to help sell the deal. Howard did a great job trying to convince Artie but in the end Artie declined.

I wonder just how much he weighs now…

Dr. Keith Ablow surprised Artie today when he walked through the studio doors for a visit. Apparently Artie blew off the doctor by sleeping through a scheduled phone call. The Doc contacted Bababooey and he suggested he do a surprise work visit.

The visit resulted in a long psychoanalysis of Artie and his past including his father. Artie and Robin chimed in with the Doctor with all their theories of what Artie needs. Artie is non-committal and said that bye the Doctor showing up at work it made him feel less of the whole situation. There was too much to write down all here but ultimately Artie agreed to go to another session.

*image from HowardStern.com

Alice and Artie have been on good terms lately and its been awhile since we heard “short dick ass Artie”. Crazy Alice called in on the show today and Artie told her he would take her to a Yankees game when she comes up to NYC this year. Unfortunately (for Artie) the time she is scheduled to come will put her here during the World Series. Artie said if the Yankees get to the World Series “we will go together”.

What was more shocking (not surprising) was Alice’s admission to be attracted to women. It sounded gay to me but she admits that she is not a sexual person. Maybe if she was she would realize that she is gay.

Here are some Alice quotes:

(to artie) “i’m attracted to you”

“i don’t consider man sexually”

“…attracted to women more”

“i won’t have sex with them”

“… i can look at a naked woman but i cant look at a naked guy”

Anyways, for those who miss the old Crazy Alice, go to the Crazy Alice Soundboard

July 18 2007

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EmfI4-BOfCc]

As heard on the Howard Stern show today, the Real Doll documentary. Thanks to our pal Matt Smith for finding this. My favorite part so far is at 1:20 when you see a foot sticking out from under a shelf or something, so creepy lol.

Enjoy:

[googlevideo=http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=3710987618964917848&hl=en]

Turns out Artie got laid over vacation with a chick in Pittsburgh. Turns out the chick was able to guess Artie stays at hotels under the name Sal Caprio. When Howard asked if she came, he kidded,