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I may want to see 50

If you are a cynical fan of Artie Lange, which I am at times, you might find yourself rolling your eyes at some of the quotes found in a recent interview/article over at newsday.com.

“Yeah, there’s a party persona, but I’m 40 and I decided I may want to see 50,” said Lange, calling from his home in Hoboken, N.J. “If I partied nearly as much as some people think I do, I’d be dead. I don’t want that. Nobody wants that - at least I don’t think they do. Some Web sites that predict my early death might want it, but I’m doing my best to disappoint them.”

“I am a gambler. I love sports. I talk about that,” he explains. “I like betting on sports still. I like going to Atlantic City and playing some games. I still drink. I haven’t done blow in a long time, but I still talk about it. I did it enough to get enough — material about that.

“If I was partying like I used to, there’s no way I’d have the job I have,” he continues. “For seven years, I’ve been getting up at 4:45 and I’m at work at 6 a.m…. When I first got the gig, I would try doing stand-up sets during the week in New York and then maybe go drinking.

“I tried staying up all night a couple of times, going straight from the bar to the diner to the studio and that doesn’t work, man. Howard will call you on it. I tried going in hung over, I tried everything. The only thing that works is ‘Look, I’m gonna take this seriously’ like Howard. You get into bed at 8, 9 o’clock and you try to fall asleep.”

“Look, it’s a sacrifice,” he says. “I’ve left Yankee World Series games early because the biggest thing in my life came along and it involves me getting up early. . . . You gotta hunker down and take something seriously.”

“As far as I knew, I didn’t have any anger problems. I’ve never really been in a fight-fight since I was like 20. I’m 40 now. My assistant - well, he doesn’t work with me anymore, but that’s just because he felt that he would be better off just working there - he’s a great kid.

“I’ve never been involved with a project like ‘The Howard Stern Show’ that’s actually a hit. When I was on ‘Mad TV’ the first year, I left that show even worse - high on coke, I took a swing at a cop - nobody cared about that. With this, it’s a credit to Howard. I have to pinch myself sometimes because it’s the biggest radio show of all time - nothing’s even close to it - and I’m on it. There’s great stuff about that and there can be bad stuff. You do good, it’s great. You — up, it’s amplified and that’s what happened. I came back humbled. You apologize and you move on to the next midget stripper.”

Read the full article here. (by Glenn Gamboa)

4 Responses to “I may want to see 50”

  1. Arties Heart Says:

    Nice several contradictions in just the quotes you posted. Forget the drugs how about putting on 100+ lbs of fat in a year? Artie has such a great wit I it’s strange that he sounds so stupid at times.

  2. artiefan Says:

    “Artie has such a great wit I it’s strange that he sounds so stupid at times.”

    Well its like actors. Just because you have a talent for something doesn’t mean you are smart in every other part of life.

  3. MattySprings Says:

    Good for you Art. Great fucking interview.

  4. Artie's Taint Says:

    I’m pullin for Artie (as his taint, I’ve no choice), his comedy is too good and his presence on the show is too important.

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