Some men go their whole lives without having their sexual adventures spread all over the internet. Eric the Midget has done this not once, but twice.
How can we forget Eric’s bunny ranch rompings? See below (with some artistry from John Alatis)
But the creme de la creme is him sexting with someone from the JFSC. If you click on this picture, you will see the photo of Eric’s cock that Howard was talking about on the show.
WARNING – NUDITY!!
The two photos below are of Eric the Midget and Air Force Amy at the Bunny Ranch right after making sweet little love. Click on the second picture for enlarged photo.
This is the Bunny Ranch thread where it was initially posted
An inside look at Eric the Midget’s quest for manhood and leaving behind once and for all his long-lasting virginity.
We all know Eric. He is your normal everyday midget with a knack for webcam chats and daily calls to the Howard Stern show to update us on the never-ending soap opera of his anger and hate-filled sad life. For years now we have marveled over his mind-numbingly dull life. We had hopes of one day seeing him take flight and fly with balloons but that never happened. We listened as he tried to con the show and audience with the belief that he fell in love with some over-priced webcam porn girl, complete with photo shoot.
After his failed attempts with his modeling agency and strippers, Eric finally figured out how to bust the seal on his pecker, stop dry humping his mattress always ending in soiled pajama pants. Eric’s quest brought him from his bubble in Sacramento, California to Moundhouse, Nevada. He did what any other thirty-something male would do if you aren’t getting laid the organic way, you pay for it.
Enter the Love Ranch.
The Love Ranch is located not too far from the infamous Bunny Ranch. Down a hill and across a highway you will you will find a nice stretch of road that depending on the time of day you can smell the fresh pleasures of a sewer treatment facility, such a fitting place for our boy to make his stand. On this road you will find a cozy cul-de-sac with three whore houses and a strip club. Eric planted his flag in the red “building” pictured below. By all outward appearances it looks okay but it is really a bunch of single and double wide mobile homes cleverly connected to each other to disguise itself as one building. Any other man of integrity would have moved on to a more upscale place but Eric pressed on knowing that his destiny awaited him there.
For all you bikers out there, there is a yearly Hells Angels’ Cathouse Poker Run that starts in Reno and goes up through Virginia City down the hill into Moundhouse and back to Reno and all of the stops to draw your poker hand are at the whorehouses. They let you take tours of the whorehouses during the run.
Eric’s sex trip photo journal:
Thank you to “Alpharaider” for her insight and photos.
Fill in the blank:
Eric the ___________ midget.
Boys’ blue PJ pants – $10
San Francisco baseball cap – $25
Pug from the local animal shelter – $100
A picture of Eric the Midget waking up in the morning – Priceless
Thanks to Tommy for sending in the picture
Also the rumor is that if you want to get Eric the Midget on AOL, his screen name is Allsports5.
Eric the Midget and Johnny Fratto called in this morning. Eric said two words and hung up.
Eric called back and started bragging about his birthday party at a strip club where Johnny paid 15 “fully naked” girls to hang around him and lap dance him all night. Howard tried to get Eric to admit that he was right about Eric not leaving the show and that he would call in again. Eric wouldn’t admit to it…actually he wouldn’t even admit that he was on the phone LOL. Then he called Steve Langford an “idiotic motherfucker”. When asked about being single Eric said, “I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one”. Eric then signed off with his “bye for good”.
Eric called back a third time. Apparently Johnny convinced Eric to call back and apologize. Eric went back into the boring details about the strip club. Instead of apologizing he became argumentative saying that Howard needed to get his hearing checked. He said he wasn’t back on the show as a regular caller (even though it was 3 times this morning). Howard reminded him that he said he was never calling back ever. Then the crazy bastard said he already apologized, but he hadn’t, and then he did for real.
Eric can’t admit the fact that he needs the show and without it he has no friendship with Johnny or any special treatment from anyone.
Also…
We heard this morning that Henry Hill got kicked out (and banned) out of a restaurant in Connecticut for getting drunk. I wish I had known he was going there, that place is right up the street from my apartment. LOL
I keep waking up halfway through these Eric the Midget bits. Now Eric is admitting to lying… but not what we all thought he was lying about. He claims that yesterday was all a sham and that they were lying about breaking up so the show would get off Kendra’s back. And now that he has a beautiful (whore) girlfriend, he is going to leave the show.
But we have all heard this before. He will be back to a week or two. He thinks the Stern fans will keep giving him attention after he leaves. Everyone really needs to leave him alone so he can see just how much the show does for his lonely ass life.
Eric the Midget on Jimmy Kimmel Live
Thanks to Allison for finding it for me!
I have pictures of Eric the Midget and Kendra’s weekend!!
I caught it about half way through this morning but apparently Eric and Kendra finally met. She stayed with Eric for 2 days, went to a strip club (Kendra’s idea – surprise), met Jimmy Kimmel and did a photo shoot. But that’s wear the fairy tale ended… Howard asked Eric about the claim that Eric’s friends convinced him to “play the field” and Eric confirmed it.
Kendra then called up during the discussion mad. Eric reiterated to her on the phone that he doesn’t want to be with her. He said he wasn’t sure what happened. Kendra asked if going to the strip club may have opened his eyes to a new world, Eric agreed.
Then Howard brought up that he thought they had prearranged this in order to get out of the whole ploy. Jimmy said there was some porn quality acting going on. “This is not a goof stern!” Eric bit back.
Steve Langford came in and broke a story he has been working on that this is all a scam. Johnny Frado and Patrick (introduced Kendra to Eric) are listed as sources. Steve claims to have text messages that prove his case. Eric says they were “doctored” by Patrick. Howard asked Eric and Kendra to swear on the life of their mother that they were telling the truth and they did.
Howard went back to treating the whole situation like it was real prying Eric for a reason why its over with Kendra. Eric had no reason. Johnny Frado called in and said that he thought the stripper said something dirty to him and got his mind turning. Eric agreed. YACK YACK.
Howard said he didn’t know what to believe and wanted a lie detector on Eric. Steve said that his source Patrick was willing to take a lie detector. Gary chimed in and said that the rumor going around the office was that Johnny was trying to take over the Stern fan crowd from Mutt (SFN) so this whole fraud was created to get more attention.
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Part of me thinks this is fake. Either 1) The Stern camp created another masterpiece, 2) Johnny, Eric and Kendra committed fraud against the Show or 3) its real and Kendra is nuts or just lying to Eric to get her website popular.
Steve Langford seems pretty convinced and maybe he is just doing a bit of pit bull news reporting trying to create a story but I just don’t get how Kendra and Eric would have”hooked up” in the first hand. This may have been all concocted to get more attention to Eric and his web cam show. With Steve breaking the story and with them already meeting there wasn’t much further they could go on with anyways. Being that Eric is a horrible ad-liber, Johnny Frado had to call in order to salvage the bad acting on the part of Eric.
On the other hand if it is real, I can understand how they would meet and things would go completely wrong. I myself have met girls on the Internet and after talking with them awhile you think the person is one way and within 5 minutes of meeting them in person its completely fucked. Eric doesn’t want to hurt her feelings so he doesn’t give a reason on the phone.
May I present to you one of the worst (best) remake’s of Wild Thing ever. This is Eric’s love song to his crazy stripper girlfriend. Full Speed Ahead Eric!
